Thursday, December 8, 2011

Holiday Movies - Fo Sho or No Sho



Before I start breaking down some Christmas Classics, let me ask you a simple question... Should animals be able to wear outfits? Right now I'm in the middle of watching Christmas Vacation with the gal and cannot help but not look at her poor cat, Owen, all decked out in a Christmas sweater... Poor guy... I mean if he could speak, do you think he would be happy about his outfit? I'm guessing he is slightly embarrassed and wants to hide in a corner so nobody can see him.


Ok, so on to the main event; Christmas movie classics. You all know the drill by now, I will give you the title of the movie, give you a little breakdown, then rate it with either Fo Sho,(great movie, must see) or No Sho (would rather stick my head in a boiling pot of hot asphalt than watch.)



Christmas Vacation: This movie sums up Christmas and a dysfunctional family at its best. So many hilarious scenes from Clark Griswold putting up 25,000 thousand twinkling lights, to Uncle Eddy emptying his crap into the city sewer. You cannot go wrong with this movie and for some reason whenever I watch it; I want to drink eggnog and rum. Maybe it’s because of the scene with Clark and Eddy, where they are drinking eggnog out of those BA moose glasses. I want those glasses soooo bad, the unfortunate part is that they are 80 bucks or more on Amazon. All I want for Xmas is a frickin moose cup!! To sum it up, this movie always brings out the laughs, but also contains sentimental value and memorable scenes you will always remember.

-FO SHO

Elf: Although this movie is a bit newer than its counterparts, it’s already a classic. Will Ferrell is hilarious in this film and there are so many scenes in this movie that you will be quoting over, and over again. “Is there sugar in syrup?... Then yes..” “I'm singing/I'm in a store/and I'm siiiiiingiiiiing!/I'm in a store/and I'm siiiiiingiiiiing!” If this movie isn’t on your must watch list, you have some serious holiday issues. Guys, if you really need a reason to watch this movie, Zooey Deschanel is the lead actress in this movie…. Enough said… Grab a 6 back of your favorite beer, make some spaghetti and poor syrup all over it, and enjoy this great movie.

-FO SHO

The Santa Clause: I’m a big fan of Tim Allen; however this move does not make the cut. For some reason this movie has only been a one-time watch type of movie, it does not depict the real Christmas spirit and has nothing memorable about it. Yes, The Santa Clause One is better than the Santa Clause Two (not much of a contest) but it just leaves me feeling like blah…. by the end of it. If you are inspired enough to watch this movie this Holiday season, I suggest buying a bottle of Tequila, 2 shot glasses, some limes, and salt. Then I suggest knocking about 3-4 back before it starts. Trust me; you will be thankful I suggested Tequila.

-NO SHO

Home Alone: Merry Christmas ya filthy animal. From Kevin not wanting to sleep with Fuller because he wets the bed, to Kevin beating up the bad guys at the end of the movie, this movie is full of laughs, suspense, and good old fashion Christmas nostalgia. The soundtrack to this movie is still one of my favorites of all time with songs such as, “da da da da, I’m dreaming, of a white Christmas,” to “Rockin around the Christmas tree,” to the Home Alone theme song. If you don’t know the H.A. theme song, Google it or something, it’s great! When all is said and done, this is a must see every Holiday season and is in my top 3 movies of all time. Before you sit down to watch this, order a large cheese pizza (Kevin’s favorite,) upgrade to a family size if you are feeling adventurous. Pour a Pepsi over ice, sit back and enjoy.

-FO SHO

White Christmas: If you want to watch a movie with the Family this year, this is the one! The songs they sing will bring you back to when your grandparents were kids and it will definitely give you the warm/fuzzies. Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye are awesome in this movie and they really complement each other both in the singing, and dancing performances. Grab your favorite wine, pop a big bowl of popcorn, sit back and enjoy this Christmas classic.

-FO SHO

Jack Frost: First off, I don’t want you to get this Jack Frost starring Michael Keaton, confused with the claymation Jack Frost, staring Heat Miser, Snow Miser, and the sleet sisters. The claymation version is a FO SHO, this crappy Jack Frost is a NO SHO. This Holiday movie has a horrible story plot and horrendous acting. Make sure not to buy kindling this year because the DVD and case are highly flammable and eco friendly. Grab some “Jack” Daniels, poor it straight, sit back and fall asleep to this Holiday disaster.

-NO SHO

A Christmas Story: Any movie that is played for 24 hours straight on television every season deserves a little bit of STOB cred. This is one movie that you can watch two to three times every year. Once Thanksgiving night, maybe December 17th or something, and then Christmas Day. From Ralphie shooting his eye out, to his dad buying a leg lamp, this movie movie will make you laugh at least 5 times. Before the movie starts, grab your booze of choice, beer, wine, hard liquor, all is welcome while watching this classic of classics.



-FO SHIZZLE



It's a Wonderful Life: Gotta add in this classic.  Poor George Bailey struggles his way through life and needs a wake up call to realize that indeed it is a "Wonderful Life"...ahhh.  This isn't my favorite Christmas movie but I seem to atleast watch a portion of this movie every year and when I do I really get the nostalgic feel of Christmas that I enjoy.  Sidebar:  Is there any more annoying voice than the little girls at the end of the movie when she says "Daddy, everytime a bell rings an angle gets it's wings."  My brain hurts just re-reading that sentance looking for my usual mispellings.  When you start the movie, stick a Bailey's Irish Cream in the Freezer, after George starts going crazy, take out the Baliey's and pour you and your significant other a glass.

- FO SHO



Muppet's Christmas Carol:  Christmas Carol alone...meh.  Christmas Carol with the Muppets?  Wucka wocka wacka... This is the most kid friendly movie of all, no adult beverages recommended.

-FO SHO! 


What are your Christmas favorites?  Or No Shos?




12 comments :

  1. Jingle all the way, "who told you you could eat my cookies!!!"

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  2. 1) It was cold in the apartment and Owen loves to be a Christmas kitty...he told me.
    2) I actually like The Santa Claus quite a bit. I don't watch it from year to year but I think I might start!

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  3. Cats hate outfits, Owen told me that this morning after you left for work.

    Santa Claus is a Terrible movie...

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  4. Anonymous, thanks for reminding me of Jingle all the Way - that movie is a NO SHO for sure

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  5. Watch Santa Clause 1, 2, 3 each year with my daughter and love every minute of it. Who don’t like to see Tim the tool man in a fat suit? Buddy the elf is great maple syrup on your spaghetti, ummmm tasty. Home Alone 2 lost in New York… pigeon lady how neat is that, two criminals getting hit with paint cans, tool drop on their head and falling down icy stairs and nails in there foot, and still get up… boy they are tough. Christmas story classic, I still want that lamp and a red rider.

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  6. Oof...the nail in the foot....thanks for that memory Anonymous.

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  7. No Rudolph the Rednoise Raindeer? I love that movie.

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  8. Rudolph is a great movie. That is def a FO SHO. All of the old claymation movies are must see's.

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  9. Cartoon version of Grinch=FO SHO...Jim Carrey version of Grinch=NO SHO.

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  10. Everyone Says that, I actually like the Jim Carey version and I usually cannot stand Jim Carey. Ben is a GRINCH!

    D

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  12. Two thumbs up on all of your assessments.
    And agree with Ben on the cartoon version of the Grinch... favorite scene is carving the roast beast!

    Oh, and to set the record straight... Ralphie's Dad did not buy the leg lamp... he won it doing his silly crossword puzzles. Which is why he was so proud to display it in the front room window. I will admit that I do own a leg lamp, and that it is illuminated every Christmas season. How sick is that! LOL

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